Sunday, November 20

Random thoughts #1

All the plans, all the things we think we know…everything, everything, everything is nothing and nothing, nothing, nothing is everything.  We are here now and for a time we will be here.  Then we will leave and we will be gone forever.  Who knows where, who knows why but what we do know is what we can and do do whilst we are here on this God forsaking planet called earth.  We try and we try to reach for the outer stars without realizing that all that light that shines so bright from the brightest stars are merely a reflection of that which is already in us.  And so we are here standing, sitting, walking, squirming and our way we do not know.  What we think we have is gone and what is gone will leave us one day the same way it came to us in the first place.  So keep what is yours or give it away.  How can we connect back to our heart when we lost it, or gave it away in the first place?  Do we pray standing, or pray kneeling or do we do as we please leaving the notion of prayer up to the holy of holies?  What does it mean to be holy?  Can one be holy? Or does  one merely strive to be holy; each day coming closer and closer into contact with the holy of all holies.  Or do we live as mere animals jumping from here to there pronging onto this then the next.  Waiting to exhale just so we can breathe the same filthy breath that we breathed the first time and then we don’t remember what it was in the first place. So where is man to go from here when he is lost, he has lost his heart and lost his mind.  He has given them to the gods and demons and vultures of the planet so he may survive his fateful or fleeting death that he so wildly chases like a bull riding trying to tame his bull until in that moment or in that instant he is bucked off and given his right of passage to the outer world…or is that what he even wants?  Perhaps he wants to stand in the rain and feel the rain drops just this once rather than try to hide beneath the protective barriers of his umbrella.  So how shall he shine, what colors will he be, how will he do it, how does he see it, where will he stand in the face of all that confronts him or that he himself confronts for himself?  These are questions which have not been answered and yet they are in the very process of being answered.  Truthfully and skillfully darkness lurks trying to find its way into the heart of man.  And man must first confront this darkness before he can strive for the light.  Or can he do both simultaneously?  This is the question that confronts man who has no place to go and hide to work on himself.  He must stand in his strength and his weakness and trust that where he is intended to go and what he is intended to do must be as it is, nothing more and nothing less than that which is given unto him or lest it be taken away.  Writing his thoughts flawlessly because they come from the ease of nothing and the strength of nothing but the truth that is within him longing to be opened up and expressed to himself and those whom he may or may not know.  That though we stand alone, in some strange and mysterious way we are connected together yet we cannot rely on this strength alone because it may lead us down a path of the unrighteous or to the righteous truth that lives within me and everyman for that matter.  So he confronts the things externally with the internal reality of not wanting some things to leave but rather wanting other things to stay as they are where they are.  This is an incomplete man who has not yet fully searched the inner workings of his life to find his strength in that which he has and is.  Sobriety then is the key to clarity and clarity is the vision of truth which precedes the mastery of that thing which is intended to be accomplished in union with itself not giving itself to other things or nothing unnecessarily but standing in the truth that he has cultivated for himself and by himself through which he has found every lasting peace and joy within the chaos of all that surrounds him.